Good Luck To Us All by Karen Vermeulen

subtitled A Graphic Memoir of Sorts.

First, big thanks to Doug and Emily for holding down the fort while I went on what I thought was going to be a working holiday… that turned into a mostly devices-free holiday. It was thus a delight to come back to work, and read and laugh and cry my way through what has turned out to be the next 5-star book on my 2025 list, Karen Vermeulen’s astonishing and gracious Good Luck To Us All.

This graphic memoir skips lightly over the first thirty-something years of the author’s life, telling us briefly about her work and world travels and disinterest in “settling down” before finding herself firmly in her 30s, single and living alone in Cape Town, South Africa. Figuring she might as well add a middle sobriquet to her chosen descriptor, she decides to adopt a cat which, unsurprisingly to this animal lover, turns out to be the best decision of her life (even if she is horribly allergic to cats.)

The chapters that follow delve with both humor and brutal honesty into the issues that plague single middle-aged women worldwide. Pets and (other people’s) children get several chapters, as do physical and spiritual health, in hilarious essays on yoga and meditation retreats. More poignant are the passages on aging and beauty. It’s probably the mom in me, but I wanted to reach through the pages and tell her “baby, no” every time she put herself down. Perhaps it’s also the fact that I’m a person who’s worked (and is still working!) hard to earn my self-esteem, and hate it when people (myself included!) have a hard time embracing their own joy and loveliness.

And Ms Vermeulen does try, and often succeeds! Her compulsive over-sharing and dark humor — both traits we have in common — make her very easy to relate to, even if her path has been quite different from my own. The sense of intimacy she builds with readers through this book is also surprisingly persuasive: I cannot tell you how tempted I was to get a cat after reading of her love for dear Henry.

But perhaps the most moving parts of this book for me were the ones on human relationships. Dating gets several chapters, ofc, from the horrors of apps, actually meeting people and, later, into several very tough chapters on relationships. The chicken story reminded me of my break-up from the ex whom I still call the Trash Fire: at the time of experiencing it, the ordeal feels absurd to the point of horrific, but you know, even in the moment, that it’s going to make an AMAZING story for you and your friends to cackle over later.

That said, the chapter I appreciate most comes from one of the most painful experiences that she and I have ever had to endure. What I’m about to discuss next is a bit of a spoiler, but I think it’s really important to talk about and I’ll explain why shortly, so apologies if this gives away a detail you’d rather be in suspense of when reading the book. You can stop reading here if you want to remain entirely spoiler-free, but if you read on, well, this is on you now.

Ms Vermeulen was surprised to get pregnant in her late 30s. She wasn’t interested in having kids, but she also couldn’t help feeling that the unplanned and not entirely desired pregnancy was a gift. Her boyfriend was supportive but ultimately left the decision up to her. It was, however, a decision she wound up not having to make, as the fetus turned out not to be viable.

Having gone through two miscarriages where I had similarly muddled up feelings — I love babies and already had three lovely ones. But did I really want to deal with the complicated reality of having more? — I felt her sorrow and guilt and confusion so keenly. Losing a pregnancy you’re ambivalent about is a sucker punch, on top of all the hormones already washing through your body. Reading her account of her own experience, I cried with the relief of feeling seen. Miscarriages are hard enough to talk about without also adding on the complexity of ambivalent feelings. She’s genuinely the first person I know who’s put into words a lot of my own distress at the experience. I’m so grateful she’s brought it out into the open, so that anyone who’s ever had that kind of loss can better cope with the unwarranted shame of losing a pregnancy you both wanted and were terrified of.

Ms Vermeulen’s accompanying cartoon art nicely punctuates the proceedings, adding even more humor and pathos than her words alone could convey. I know she feels a bit embarrassed that it took her seven years to finish this book, but I think it was a phenomenal use of seven years, and a memoir she couldn’t have written and drawn as well in less. It’s not a perfect book but it’s raw and refreshing, rather like the sushi she (also relatably) can’t give up. I loved it.

Good Luck To Us All by Karen Vermeulen was published February 18 2025 by Catalyst Press and is available from all good booksellers, including