Dr Miss Mathilde von Zahnd runs one of the most renowned, and one of the most expensive, private psychiatric clinics in all of Switzerland. The enormous fees paid by the rich clientele — in the stage notes before the play proper, Dürrenmatt speaks of moronic millionaires, schizophrenic authors, arteriosclerotic politicians — have enabled most of the patients to move into a new building overlooking a lake in the midst of idyllic grounds that surround the von Zahnd family’s former summer villa. The villa was the first home of the clinic, and the renovation was not always architecturally kind. In the salon where the play’s action takes place the walls up to head level have been covered with institutional paint; above the original detailing remains including some remaining stucco work. Only three patients remain in the villa: one who thinks he is Sir Isaac Newtown, one who thinks he is Albert Einstein, and Johann Wilhelm Möbius, also a physicist. Unfortunately, one of the patients — the one who thinks he is Einstein — has just strangled one of the nurses. Even more unfortunately, this comes mere weeks after Newton also strangled a nurse.
The play begins with the police inspector Robert Voß taking statements from head nurse Marta Boll. That The Physicians will be a comedy, however dark, becomes apparent early on. Voß recounts the earlier killing and ventures the opinion that it would never have happened with male attendants.
Head Nurse: You believe that? Nurse Dorothea Moser [the first victim] was a member of the Women’s Wrestling Club and Nurse Irene Straub [the victim whose body is still on stage] was state champion of the national judo club.
Inspector: And you?
Head Nurse: I lift weights.
Inspector: Can I now see the murderer —
Head Nurse: Please, Herr Inspector
Inspector: The perpetrator?
Head Nurse: He’s playing the violin.
Inspector: What do you mean, he’s playing the violin?
Head Nurse: You can hear it.
Inspector: Then he should stop. [Head Nurse does not react] I have to question him.
Head Nurse: Can’t do that.
Inspector: Why can’t I do that?
Head Nurse: We can’t allow that for medical reasons. Herr Ernesti must play the violin now.
Inspector: The guy strangled a nurse after all!
Head Nurse: Herr Inspector. It is not a matter of a guy, but about an ill person who has to calm himself. And because he thinks he is Einstein, the only way that he can calm himself is to play the violin.
Inspector: Am I the crazy one here?









